We don't plan on having any more kids. As I sit and watch my youngest run through the house and antagonize is older brother, I am suddenly stunned. My baby isn't a baby anymore. I am just now noticing how big he is, how many words he is saying and how independent he is. Babyhood is gone and toddlerhood is here as loud and strong as a tornado.
I find myself wishing, sometimes, that he will wake up in the middle of the night so I can hold him in my arms. When he does, I rock just a little longer than he needs, close my eyes and breathe in his sweetness as he nuzzles my neck. It's quiet and dark but I can see the outline of his nose and hear the deep sigh he breathes as he wraps his arms around me.
When my oldest greets me in the morning, I find myself holding on just a little longer. He pulls away, ready for adventure but I pull him in close, and he lets me, for a lingering embrace and remember in that quiet moment he's my baby.